By: Kathy Anderson

Horses have always brought out the best and worst in me. A retired American Saddlebred brood mare named Cece challenged every aspect of my personality. She had been a show horse so she knew the tricks of the trade and would proudly prance around the arena with her head high and her alert eyes catching the attention of onlookers. But like me, a professional woman who knew the tricks of my trade, was tired of doing it.

So the battle would start from the time I went to halter her in her paddock. It usually took three people to catch her then she would squeal loudly as I took her away from her handsome paddock mate Wilbur, a gray Arabian. She paced the nearby arena screaming to him to rescue her. When I couldn’t get her attention to turn her out, I decided to pace in her same tracks and call to Wilbur myself.

She stopped pacing and stared at me wondering if I was her new competition. It worked and I got her attention. After battle one was won, battle two of putting on a saddle was raged. Her time at the post was traumatic for both of us. She must have had some painful memories there and would knock her head against the post so much her nose would bleed. She pawed the ground as if she was digging to China and then would make quick passes at me with her teeth.

I realized that her memories at the post must have been dreadful so I learned to stay out of her way. I became determined to change her experiences for the better. Working with her was frustrating and made my blood boil with anger. After being bitten, kicked and pushed up against the post, my patience was waning and I would cry from exhaustion and anger. But something in me just didn’t want to give up. After a friend’s recommendation, I tried a concoction of Bach Flowers and found they had a slight calming effect on her and with gentle massaging on her neck and spine, she finally calmed down a bit at the hitching post. Next was the arena.

The same three people who helped me catch her in the paddock now had to hold her so I could get on her. After a few moments of good equitation, she decided she didn’t want me on board anymore and started rearing up. I became scared with this new action and wanted to abandon riding her. I went home and talked to a few friends about my experience. The same friend who recommended the Bach Flower essences suggested I check her saddle for proper fit.

The next time out, I decided since she had been a show horse, I should ride her in an English saddle and not the western one. This made a big difference and seemed to fit her better but she still wanted to rear. I worked with cowboy Kenny who showed me how to drive her forward to stop her rearing. Now I was pissed that she took so much work to ride and I was facing some real fears with the constant rearing. Kenny told me “if you don’t ride her through that rearing, you ain’t never gonna ride that horse.” I was forced to face my fears, my patience and my need to find a solution to all the problems I was facing with this horse. A “not gonna quit” power came over me.

Overcoming tremendous fear I rode her through her rearing and she stopped doing it. Experimenting with new techniques of massage and a firm “in charge” manner brought out a stronger me. I talked to this horse and tried to listen to her point of view then tried to turn her around to my point of view. I related to this older female who knew what it was like to dazzle a crowd but didn’t want to anymore.

I mentally connected to this horse at all levels and she learned to trust me enough that I could get her myself from the paddock, she would stand still at the hitching post and would stand still so I could mount her without people holding her. Persistence and consistency is what it took. Many people remarked how Cece had changed working with me and they couldn’t believe it was the same horse. It took a while for us to come around but we became a team. But without my “treatments of gentle massage” and Bach Flowers and my focused attention to listening to her, she resorted to her nasty ways again and finally tried to buck me off at a canter. I can’t say I gave up, I just told the ranch owner that I would continue to work with her as a patient with my experimental treatments of massage and Bach flowers but I could no longer commit to riding her. I didn’t give up.

I just accepted that maybe her bad memories were too deep and her need to do things her way were too embedded in her personality. I know I changed her for a time and I was changed. Unlike Cece, I knew I wasn’t ready to retire from my profession but instead I would take what I learned from working with her to my career. I now know that every challenge I face will challenge my anger to become patience and my frustration to spark my intuition for an inventive solution. I take these lessons with me every day and I thank Cece for the opportunity to have learned this about myself.